A woman's wedding day is special. It's the start of a new journey as her family becomes bigger and she gets to spend the rest of her life with the love of her life. A huge part of a wedding is the tradition of the father of the bride walking her down the aisle. The father is a source of strength for his daughter on her wedding day. Having her dad by her side could calm her nerves on her big day. But a 27-year-old revealed that her future mother-in-law banned her own father from being a part of the wedding ceremony because of his "serious disfigurement".
The unidentified woman took to Slate's advice column, Dear Prudence , asking for help to deal with this situation. She wrote that she was engaged to an "amazing guy" and was in the process of planning her wedding when things took an unexpected turn. She explained, When I was a little girl, my dad was involved in a really bad accident and was burned over a large portion of his body. He lost part of one limb and has some serious disfigurement. He has been a great dad and I never think about it. But she noticed her fiancé acting strange every time they had to discuss or talk about the wedding.
I asked him what was up and he avoided the question. Then his mom called me out of the blue and told me that she didn’t think that my dad should come to the wedding. She thinks that he will upset the guests and “traumatize” any children who might be there, she said and continued, She is suggesting that we have a private family ceremony before the big blowout. I got upset and my mom asked why. When I told her, she said that she and my dad understand, which only makes me feel worse. Maybe my future MIL has a point, but I would really rather disinvite HER than my dad.
The advice column kindly informed the woman that her fiancé was not as amazing as she thought he was. They stated that a better response to his mother's "outrageous and sickening" request to disinvite the bride's father would be to take a stand and say, "Mom, Elise’s dad is a great person. That he has overcome a terrible trauma makes me admire him even more. You need to permanently drop this. He’ll not only be there, but he’ll also walk her down the aisle, and I don’t want to hear another negative word about him." But, instead, he squirmed around the subject and did not even have the decency to warn her about his mother's "despicable request".
It was up to her now to sort this out with her fiancé. If he really wanted to, he could have already warned his mother that not including her father was out of line. How he should and could have handled this situation was very telling of how worthy he was of becoming a part of the family. Dear Prudence concluded by saying, And I hope you tell your parents that if they are not both at the wedding and treated as guests of honor, you won’t be there, either.